Forced Fantasies

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From Joan
I have hot fantasies of being forced to do dirty smutty things, scenes I'd hardly be interested in doing in real life; sometime it's men forcing me, sometimes women. The fantasies are wildly exciting, and so damn hot. I say three cheers for vivid imaginations!

From J.T.
Rape as an act is a cruel, vicious, monstrous crime and in no way do I want my views to suggest that I endorse or even like the idea of rape itself.

Rape fantasies are different from the crime of rape. As far as that's concerned, whatever consenting adults wish to do to get their rocks off is their own damn business and none of mine. I confess that I've never experimented with rape fantasy beyond a little light bondage and some S/M and master-slave scenarios. I've enjoyed them, but I wouldn't say that they've gone very far into the 'warped and twisted' end of the spectrum. Nevertheless, if two (or more) people wish to carry sex to that extreme, hey, whatever gets you off. (pun intended)

From Mike
I have an imagination that embarrasses me sometimes. It doesn't know that I am a nice person. It just puts itself places and drags me behind it. So, imagining rape and sexual gratification - try this recipe - but only in your imagination:

Two cups of hate
One cup of resentment
2 ozs of bitterness
1 twist of evil intent

mix together and provide opportunity

What you get is triumph. Schandenfreud. Vitriol. Release. Adrenalin rush. Twisted pleasure. And a strong reinforcement to do it again if you get away with it. When I imagine rape and raping I am appalled at how easy it might be. How horrible it would be. How vivid it would be. That's why I don't like real rape stories. They twist my guts.

From Morganna L.
I think the distinction between fantasy and reality is the main point in this ( and many other) discussions.  I am a highly-educated woman, a sociologist as a matter of fact, and while I risk my friendships, career and credibility with this admission, I believe it's important to make a public statement here.  Yes, I am turned on by rape fantasies. I imagine them during sex, and I write about them.  There is no moment, though, where I would want to be actually raped. There is no moment in the world where I think it's "okay" to actually rape, coerce, or otherwise force another person into a sexual act. I could post a whole long lecture here about "guilt" and sex and the "freedom" of non-consent (in a psychological way). Relax, I won't.  But the bottom line is, "stroke material" is whatever you "allow" yourself to be turned on by  --particularly stuff that goes against public policy. And as long as no one confuses fantasy for reality there is no problem. 

I know, I know, some feminists argue (quite forcefully) that "fantasy" depictions of violence and rough sex "teach" men (it's usually me, they say) that it's "ok" to act this way in the real world.  The same argument is used regarding media in general. ("Movies cause violence, rape, anti-social behavior, patriarchy, racism," etc.) I'm afraid I don't buy it and never will without irrefutable proof that explains the presence of these acts across cultures and history. So...enjoy your fantasies and I'll enjoy mine.

From Joe Abernathy
Here's a twist on all these discussions. I had an off-on sexual relationship with a feminist friend for several years. The topic of rape was a serious hot button for her. The very subject angered her. As we got explored our physical relationship together she would talk about rape dreams she had. Her voice would shake, her face would flush as she described them. She would writhe and I would touch her. She was always wet and her clit swollen. The twist was that she it wasn't so much the rape fantasy that had her excited. Her dreams, her stories would always finish with her killing the rapist. She would shoot off or cut off his cock and balls and watch him die in shock and pain and humiliation. It was while telling those endings to her dreams or stories that she'd come.

She'd let me fuck her after she came. Sometimes she'd come again with my cock in her. She'd grab my balls and twist them a little while I fucked her. I knew where her head was and it was all scary and hot at the same time.

From Sindy
My lover and I acted out a forced scenario and it was totally awesome. We had teased and talked about it but had never really given it any serious consideration until one night we were talking on the phone and our imaginations got the best of us. The conversation ended with the teasing statement that he might show up and take me by force. Not really sure that he was serious I left him a way to gain entry to the house and went to bed. I woke to the sensation that someone was standing over me. As my eyes focused in the dark his face swam into view before me. Before I could react he pushed me onto my stomach, pushed my face into the pillow, positioned himself above me and took me then and there. Even now weeks later I can relive the sensations, the sound of his voice, the level of his excitement and the intensity of his climax. It was the most erotic experience of my life and left me wanting to experience it again and again.

Having said all of this, the one huge difference between our fantasy and reality is that I knew who was in my bed. I knew he truly would not hurt me. I was never afraid or terrified. There was never any violence. In our fantasies we control what is going on even if we act them out with a partner. Rape victims have that control stripped from them in the most terrifying way. Rape creates terror, pain, both physical and emotional, violates your sense of safety and so much more that I am sure I cannot even begin to understand.

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